I’ve cheated on eight boyfriends — now I’m engaged but I won’t stop

‘I’m quite genuine, soft and sweet,’ bride-to-be Danielle*, 38, tells Metro. ‘But I’ve cheated on eight serious partners — including my fiancé.

‘I do feel guilty, but I think most people would cheat if they knew they would never get caught.’

Danielle has been with her boyfriend for two years, but says she always finds herself climbing back into her first love’s bed – the only man she’s ever stayed faithful to – even if she vows that this time things will be different.

Now, she’s due to wed at the end of the year, and her husband-to-be has no idea that she’s been playing away throughout their entire relationship.

We’ve all heard the phrase ‘once a cheat, always a cheat’, and recently, infidelity has been all over the headlines.

Earlier this month, footage emerged of married I’m A Celeb winner, Danny Jones, which appeared to capture him ‘kissing’ Love Islander Maura Higgins.

It’s reportedly not the first time Danny has strayed either; the McFly singer was dating model Laura Coleman in 2009 when he met – and allegedly kissed – his now-wife, Georgia Horsley.

And now, the fall-out from the so-called kiss continues, as Danny issued a public statement, saying ‘I want to deeply apologise to my wife and family for putting them in this situation.’ Rumours also suggest that Georgia has moved out of their family home.

When it comes to repeat offending Danny’s not alone, as 41% of women and 49% of men in the UK admit to being serial cheats. And Danielle says that part of the reason why she does it, is because after cheating once, the habit gets normalised.

‘No one would ever suspect me’

‘The first time I ever cheated was on my university boyfriend.’ Danielle tells Metro.

‘We’d been dating for two months when he went away one weekend, and my ex asked me to meet him at the pub. I was still hung up on him, so I went.

‘I can’t blame the drink, but we nipped back to mine and did the deed. I think it was the thrill of doing something bad and getting away with it. But we vowed never to tell anyone.’

For the rest of her two-year long relationship, Danielle snuck off to have sex with her ex once a week, and also began sleeping with her housemate, admitting it became easy to give into ‘the spur of the moment desire for sex’.

‘There was one occasion when my boyfriend was asleep in my bed, so I went into my housemate’s room, had sex with him, and then got back into bed with my partner,’ she says.

‘I know it sounds evil and I did think, “you absolute b**ch”, but my cheating snowballed from there.’

Danielle, who admits to having a high sex drive, says that often, her cheating begins after an argument. ‘I’m reactive, and when someone hurts me, I want to hurt them back,’ she explains.

This was the case with her fiancé, who she met in 2023 at a party.

‘When we first started dating I thought: “No, I’m not going to cheat”. He knew I’d cheated in the past, but not the full extent,’ she recalls.

‘I really did try hard not to. But then one day we had an argument and he called me a sl*g, so I joined IllicitEncounters.

‘Two days later I shagged a married man in the back of his wife’s Range Rover in a pub car park.’

Danielle began to get in the habit of going elsewhere for sex, and admits she continues to enjoy the thrill of cheating,

While she has never confessed to her fiancé, because she doesn’t ‘want to see anyone hurt’, she says she does feel bad for the wives and girlfriends of the men she has sex with.

She adds that she thinks her cheating would come as a surprise to people that know her, commenting: ‘I don’t think people would think I’d do that.’

To keep up her double life, everything on Danielle’s phone is password protected and hidden in folders, and she doesn’t share her location with her partner.

‘I’ve only been found out twice,’ she says. ‘One boyfriend had a friend follow me when I was with another man. And my most recent ex found out when I became pregnant – he was out of the country when I conceived. I had a miscarriage and left him month later.’

Despite the occasional twinge of guilt, Danielle insists she has no desire to change her ways.

‘I really do love my fiancé, but I’m getting married because it’s something he really wants. I’ve never wanted to tie the knot, but it’s important to him,’ she says.

Danielle also sees her cheating as way to protect her relationship. ‘If someone else was telling me they did what I do, I’d think “God, you’re awful”. But I think it takes a very brave person to be with someone forever and not cheat,’ she adds.

‘I’ve seen those relationships become sexless and unhappy, and I don’t want that for myself. So, I’ll continue to cheat.’

‘I realised I could have my cake and eat it too’

Alicia*, from Nottingham, agrees that cheating is easier after you’ve done it once. The teacher has been with her boyfriend, who she met at school, for three years when she went behind his back for the first time.

32-year-old Alicia tells Metro: ‘I went to Egypt with a friend and met an English guy out there, who happened to be from my hometown.

‘The chemistry was there immediately, but at the time, I didn’t even consider that something would happen.’

However, back home, the pair continued to meet up, and Alicia says that even though it was in group settings,’there was no denying there was a spark.’

‘We’d always gravitate towards each other, and it was clear the feeling was mutual,’ she adds. ‘Then, one night, we finally kissed.’

At first, Alicia ‘felt awful’, and told herself it was a one-time mistake.

‘But the thing about cheating, is that once you’ve crossed that boundary, there’s no going back,’ she says. ‘I guess I realised I could have my cake and eat it too.’

Alicia began sleeping with her holiday romance regularly, all behind her boyfriend’s back.

‘I remember there was one day, where I slept with them both,’ she remembers. ‘It sounds shocking, but I was so far into it by then, it didn’t feel like a big deal.

‘There was one occasion when my boyfriend saw the other guy’s watch on my bedside table. I somehow managed to think on my feet and make up a lie. I said one of my friends had been round, and it was her boyfriend’s.’

After three months, Alicia moved away and the affair ended. When she revealed all to her boyfriend, he dumped her – but they kept in touch and about two months later, got back together.

‘I mainly agreed to start things up again because I felt bad,’ she says. ‘The problem was, cheating changed everything. Once I knew I could have those feelings for someone else, the relationship with my boyfriend just wasn’t the same.

‘We were long-distance, and I met a guy at work. He wasn’t my usual type, but had charisma with a capital ‘C’. And of course, the fact that I couldn’t have him made me want him even more.

‘I tried really hard not to do anything, but I was like a moth to a flame, and soon I was straying again.

‘In a way it’s ironic, because I was so consumed with guilt from cheating the first time, that I stayed with my then-boyfriend because I didn’t want to hurt him. But being in an unfulfilling relationship only led to me cheating even more.’

The relationship finally broke down a few years later.

Alicia says: ‘Funnily enough, he dumped me. He never knew about my serial cheating, but I think he knew he deserved more.

‘I’ve been in another relationship since, and I didn’t cheat. So maybe the spell is finally broken.’

‘It’s a pattern of self-sabotage’

These stories might feel bleak, but Dr Emily May tells Metro that just because you’ve strayed once, it doesn’t mean you’re destined to do it again.

‘Cheating is often tied to emotional dissatisfaction, boredom, insecurity, or seeking validation,’ she explains. ‘When it happens, some people are immediately flooded with guilt and panic. They realise the damage they’ve done and never do it again.’

But, it’s not the case for everyone.

‘It can be the start of a slippery slope,’ she says. ‘Some are wired to keep seeking attention, excitement, or new conquests.’

Emily says serial cheats will justify their actions by telling themselves they ‘couldn’t help it’ or that ‘everyone cheats’.

‘If someone keeps cheating despite knowing it’s hurting their partner, it’s usually because they prioritise their own desires over the relationship,’ the therapist, for Private Sugar Club, explains. ‘Some people thrive on the secrecy and excitement, while others lack impulse control or believe they won’t get caught.’

She adds that cheaters may also ‘feel trapped in the relationship but stay out of guilt, leading them to seek escape through infidelity rather than making the difficult decision to leave.’

‘Ultimately,’ says Emily, ‘it really depends on the person, their values, and whether they take responsibility for their actions.’

This story was originally published on March 7, 2025.

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