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No wonder EastEnders has lost 27million fans… the BBC’s self-destructive woke will has ruined it & most other TV dramas

Collage of EastEnders cast members.

FORTY years after it started darkening the nation’s mood, the weight of EastEnders’ misery finally got to a suicidal Phil Mitchell last week, when he started talking to a pile of clothes.

Whether he thought they were mum Peggy, brother Grant or the agent he probably hasn’t spoken to since 1995, I don’t know.

Scene from EastEnders featuring Jamie Winstone as Peggy Mitchell, Daniel Delaney as a young Phil, and Steve McFadden as Phil Mitchell.
PA
Jaime Winstone is currently haunting the Square as a youngish version of ‘Peggy Mitchell’[/caption]
Scene from EastEnders showing two men in conversation.
BBC
EastEnders could once command an audience of up to 30million viewers, as the show did on Christmas day 1986, it now survives on about a tenth of that number[/caption]

But there was decades of despair in the tormented old slaphead’s voice when he screamed: “Enough! Enough! Enough!”

An echo of my own thoughts as the soap celebrates its landmark birthday in characteristically cheerful mood with Phil having a mental breakdown, Nigel confronting his Alzheimer’s diagnosis and Alfie no longer able to get it up on account of prostate ­cancer.

Or at least, that’s what he’s telling Kat.

The show’s obsessively PC agenda also remains so carved in stone that we recently discovered Elaine’s dead husband John was a closeted gay man (tick) who was in love with a drag queen (tick tick) who’s HIV+, (tick tick tick).

A ­combination that may well represent the most EastEnders back story of all time.

If it still looks and sounds depressingly smug and similar to the 1980s version, one thing has changed beyond all recognition.

Whereas EastEnders could once command an audience of up to 30million viewers, as the show did on Christmas Day 1986, it now survives on about a tenth of that number.

In due course, I’m sure, the BBC News Verify unit will blame this astonishing rate of attrition on Donald Trump, Brexit and global warming.

However, I’m sticking with the theory it’s largely down to competition, market forces and the bone-brained 2001 decision to broadcast the show four times a week which led to a catastrophic over-supply of everything from blackmail ­stories and infidelities to members of the living dead (Den, Cindy, Kathy) and ghosts like Jaime Winstone who is currently haunting the Square as a youngish version of “Peggy Mitchell”.

These are the obvious signs of a desperate show that knows it’s in a bit of trouble.

The subtler one is that EastEnders no longer has storylines, as such — it has sagas that are stretched out over months and years rather than weeks, as they used to be.

These have recently included: the saga of Linda’s alcoholism, the saga of Tommy turning into a little turd, the saga of Phil’s mental breakdown, the saga of Bianca’s abduction and the ongoing saga of Sonia’s fertility and reproductive organs which has produced some of the most gynaecological dialogue in EastEnders’ history.

“It’s good news,” she exclaimed recently, with what seemed like genuine excitement.

A worried woman sits in a chair looking at a laptop.
BBC
EastEnders no longer has storylines — it has ongoing sagas that are stretched out over months such as Sonia’s fertility[/caption]

“The drugs have stimulated my ovary production efficiency and the doctors are really happy with my follicle growth.”

Little wonder then that an astonishing 27million viewers have thought “sod that” and turned instead to the more carefree charms of Towie and the internet.

SELF-DESTRUCTIVE WOKE WILL

A pattern that, if it were to continue, would mean it’s 50/50 whether EastEnders will still be around to celebrate its 50th birthday.

If it was axed next week, though, the BBC1 soap would still have won the most ­pyrrhic TV victory of all time because, over the course of those 40 years, it’s not just bent Coronation Street to its grim, self-destructive woke will, it’s done the same thing to almost every mainstream drama on television which, just like EastEnders, mostly now start from the assumption that all men are either weak or evil and women are long-suffering.

As a result, you can forget any idea it’ll cut back the number of episodes or hope for a mass cull of misery guts in the Queen Vic inferno ­during next week’s live ­episode.

The only character it’s scheduled to lose, in fact, is pregnant Sonia who’ll probably be thrilled to leave after this week’s update from a midwife: “You’ve suffered a premature rupture of your membranes. We need to be on the look-out for any flu like symptoms, any nasty discharges and . . . ”

Enough. Enough. Enough.

Random TV irritations

THE Last Leg imagining there’s anything edgy about repeatedly calling Donald Trump a “c***”.

BBC1’s Virdee getting lost in its diversity lectures and cop show ­cliches. Mel B confusing being a tactless old boot with “just being honest”.

And 50-year-old outward bounds bore Bear Grylls announcing he wants to live to the age of 200.

So why not just watch all eight ­episodes of Celebrity Bear Hunt and feel like you have? It’d spare the world an awful lot of bad telly.

Great sporting insights

MIRON MUSLIC: “We have to perform day in, day out, every weekend.”

Vicky Gomersall: “The games keep coming thick and thin.”

Sam Matterface: “Tottenham’s Dane Scarlett makes his debut for the first time.”

(Compiled by Graham Wray)

Unexpected morons in the bagging area

THE Chase, Bradley Walsh: “What letter is silent in the word fracas?”

Alys: “Q.”

Impossible, Rick Edwards: “After which famous artist was the winning horse at the 2019 Epsom Derby named? A) Anthony Van Dyck, B) Vincent van Gogh . . . ”

Oli: “C) Hertz Van Rental.”

And Impossible contestant Debbie, who was offered “A) Joe McFadden” or “C) Joe Sugg” as possible answers to the question, “Which Strictly Come Dancing finalist began appearing in the West End musical Waitress in September 2019?” but opted for “B) Joe Strummer.”

Lookalike of the week

Collage of a police officer and Bela Lugosi as Dracula.
Sent in by P Burkett, of Millwall, South London

THIS week’s winner is Sanjeev Bhaskar as the entirely surplus-to-requirements DI Sunil Khan on Unforgotten, and Grandpa Munster.

TV gold

SKY Atlantic trailers for series three of TV’s best drama, The White Lotus, which starts on Monday at 9pm.

Brilliant Victoria Hamilton stealing most of the acting honours as Juliet Cooper in ITV’s vaguely intriguing sixth run of Unforgotten.

Daniel Delaney absolutely nailing the young, throwback version of Phil Mitchell on last night’s EastEnders.

And episode three of BBC2’s Life And Death Row, about Ramiro Gonzales, which avoided the usual bias traps and, like every great documentary about executions, forced viewers to question their own views on the death penalty.

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Ronnie O’Sullivan responds to criticism after late Welsh Open withdrawal

2024 Xi'an Grand Prix - Day 5
Ronnie O’Sullivan pulled out of the Welsh Open less than 24 hours before he was due to play (Getty)

Ronnie O’Sullivan insists he is prioritising his ‘health and well-being’ after his late withdrawal from the Welsh Open this week.

The Rocket has not played since the Championship League in January when he withdrew before his final group game. During the tournament, he lost three of his four matches and snapped his cue after missing an easy pink in a 3-2 defeat to Robert Milkins.

O’Sullivan then pulled out of the Masters at Alexandra Palace and the German Masters in Berlin.

Less than 24 hours before he was due to play in the Welsh Open this week, O’Sullivan withdrew from the tournament in Llandudno.

O’Sullivan’s decision sparked criticism from fans who had purchased tickets to watch him play, while his call to pull out of the tournament means he has now withdrawn from six ranking tournaments this season.

CBSA Snooker Superstar Invitational Tournament 2025 - Day 2
Ronnie O’Sullivan has withdrawn from six ranking events this season (Getty)

On Thursday night, O’Sullivan released a statement to fans which read: ‘I realise plenty of people who bought tickets to some recent snooker events will have been frustrated when I withdrew, so I just wanted to say sorry to those of you who’ve been disappointed with me having to pull out of those tournaments.

‘I’ve been trying to prioritise my health and well-being, which sometimes means making last-minute decisions not to play. It’s never an easy decision and I hate letting people down.

‘I’m doing what I can to get back to my best, and I’m grateful for all your support and understanding.’

O’Sullivan’s return date remains unclear but his next scheduled game is in the World Open against Stuart Carrington in China on February 23.

Speaking about his decision to withdraw from the Masters in January, the 49-year-old told Eurosport: ‘It was a nightmare decision really to make, if you’d have asked me Sunday if I was ready to play I’d probably have been ok to play. But it’s such a massive tournament.

‘I’d been on a three-week trip away playing and I just think I exhausted myself, a lot of pressure while I was away. The build-up of all that just got a bit too much really.

‘I lost the plot on Thursday, snapped my cue, so that’s unplayable, so I knew at that moment in time the right decision was to not play and such a big tournament that I thought whoever was to come in should have had at least a couple of days notice.’

When asked about his snapped cue, O’Sullivan said: ‘It was in the bin, one of them wheelie bins, but my mate said we can’t leave that here, so he got it out and brought it with us.

‘I’ve got a couple of other cues that I can start practicing with because there’s some tournaments coming up. I’m going to continue to play so I need to get used to the cue now.’

For more stories like this, check our sport page.

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Irish teenager breaks Romelu Lukaku record to become youngest European goal scorer

Molde v Shamrock Rovers - UEFA Conference League Knockout Phase Play-off 1st Leg
16-year-old Noonan scored the winner away in Norway (Picture: Sportsfile via Getty Images)

Shamrock Rovers starlet Michael Noonan has broken records in becoming the youngest goal scorer in European club competition history with his winning goal against Molde.

At 16 years and 197 days, his second-half goal saw him become the youngest scorer in modern UEFA club competitions since group stages began in 1992, not including preliminary rounds.

The teenager beats the record previously held by Romelu Lukaku, set by the Belgian back in 2009.

Kildare-born Noonan was making his debut for the Hoops as they picked up a priceless 1-0 victory in their Europa Conference League play-off first leg away in Norway.

It leaves the Irish side in control ahead of the second leg in Dublin next week, within touching distance of the last 16 of the competition.

Noonan was handed a starting role on Thursday night and was also involved in the incident that saw Molde reduced to 10 men with Valdemar Lund sent off for the hosts.

His big moment came as the game approached the hour mark.

Molde v Shamrock Rovers - UEFA Conference League Knockout Phase Play-off 1st Leg
Noonan’s winner has Rovers on the brink of the last 16 (Picture: Getty Images)

Mats Dahli, once of Manchester United and Cardiff City, was caught in possession by Dylan Watts who found Noonan in the box to slide home from close range.

Rovers have enjoyed a remarkable European campaign, becoming the first League of Ireland side to reach the knockout stages of a major competition.

More to follow

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